The type who orders black coffee in shops called Chocolates Make You Kiss and draws over pages other people have marked theirs.
Bitter. Really upset I can’t go home on Wednesday.
Photos from my first exposure exhibit which opened last two weeks ago and ends tomorrow. A very singular opportunity, so I saved this one non-blurry photo of me between my two pieces. I suddenly get very fidgety placed in front of a camera. I hoped to get a better one for keeps but never got the chance to, so the dorky outtake stays.
Existence: A Southern Exposures Series
Qube Gallery, Cebu City
August 4, 2014
Apartments (Top) and Biome (Bottom). Tzaddi Esguerra 2014. Oil on Canvas. 3’x 4’
These are my 6th and 7th paintings since first starting relatively large artwork on canvas in 2010.
The exhibit note at the gallery reads that I “wittily use parts of the human anatomy to talk about two different but related things: urbanism and ecosystems”. Our group series was titled Existence, so I guess that interpretation checks out pretty well too.
Contrary as it is to my overall semblance and the popular belief that I must be neuter or what, all I ever really talk about is love, actually. At least in paintings and prose - I romanticize everything. haha. We were told to paint about “body and soul” a couple of months ago and the first thing that came to mind was a favorite Psychedlic Furs song.
I played around with the idea in that one line of that song that there are ghosts in people that don’t fade. The sort that haunts; only instead of walking through walls, they live inside you. Quite comfortably, like they own the place.
So these little dwellers that lurk in the corners of your mind, you’re all pretty aware of them but I just wanted you to see them in high definition. Close up. Look. They’re making landscapes and homes out of you.
End of charaught.
I just want to give out one big thank you to the people who took the time to come all the way to see my work displayed at the gallery. Your support means a lot.
It’s an awful thing to say, really, but I wish I could have done more with my work. Painting is an awfully painful learning process but thank you loads for the support. The facebook tags are really kilig :))
The kid behind me in the queue earlier tonight asked me sheepishly if I knew what Kure Colors were. Actually he already looked like he could’ve already been in college but he called me ‘te’ so…
It boggled and quite honestly flattered me why he asked me in particular but only up until I happened to look down and remember I was cradling eight of the last tubes of titanium white in the entire Cebu franchise of National Bookstore (I’ve checked. FA students, terribly sorry) and a bottle of brush cleaner.
Poor kid must’ve thought I knew what I was doing.
Lucky thing they’re only one of my faaaavourite things in the world! I felt very big-sisterly chatting him up about alcohol-based markers and the scant hope of ever finding colors worth buying at NBS all the way to the register. We hit it off well enough to smile and wave at parting.
Fine Arts pud ka te?
Oh you. No, hurry, go away!
I was coming down with a fever on my way home last Tuesday - dozed off in the middle of traffic and all. So I stopped at the grocery to pick myself up some feel-better-now goods.
Funny thing was when I got this call from friends at my old local art group while dragging my lazy butt across the grocery aisles, I just absolutely lit up. I mean, I was circling the fruit and produce section for about half an hour aimlessly and all but heck, I was so in the zone, talking to them over the phone smiling and getting giddy like a dork.
Bet I was running on adrenaline there because I may have made pretty outrageous promises over that phone call. And I’ve had chills still, that night, despite all the citrus and paracetamols and carbohydrateloving I self prescribed.
But the prospect of my knuckles possibly getting burned against canvas within the month. Haaah :)
Don’t Be Afraid of Blank Sheets
Ricky Vega Nierva, Production Designer at Pixar Animation Studios talks about his design process for the movie “Up”, his kids, and my favorite Picasso quote.
May 26, 2014
I felt pretty rotten the whole morning because of something terrible I did. I’m not usually an arse but I pretty much was nonetheless, earlier, when I may have used a tone on the jeepney driver on my way to work.
I missed my stop because the driver was being a typical Cebuano motorist on a Monday: dim. I don’t know what he meant to beat the red light for other than have us sit right at the very middle of the highway intersection. Hello angry commuters left, right, ahead and behind.
I got off a block away from where I’m supposed to take my next cab which would’ve been alright, I think. Had it not been one really big block.
Long story short, there was venom in my voice when I
asked told the driver to just stop after missing two stops. It’s one of those things you regret the moment you hear yourself say it. Dang. Enough venom to send an average male raving about me to other passengers. haha. I was in the passenger’s seat by the way, so you can imagine how embarrassing it was.
If I ever have kids I’ll tell them never to bully cab drivers. They ruin souls. My EQ is down by 19 points today, I think.
What stuck with me most out of all the things gran ever said was when she told me when I was 17 and foolish, “You’re an artist, you have to get used to walking alone,” .
She meant it as a jest, of course. I had been bugging mom to drive me to the market so early in the morning so I could talk to some people for this short film I was working on.
I appreciate her words now more than ever. I still want to pursue art. Maybe she meant there are just things that have got to be done eyes closed, tummy in, breath held tight against the aftertaste, maybe. Like cough syrup when you were seven. And we can only hope one day, there’s a good reason for all of it.
There’s a chance she couldn’t have meant that, exactly but I take comfort in romanticizing her little jest.
Lola was one of the most loving people I’ve ever had in my life and we miss her dearly especially today, exactly a year since she passed.
Awful lot of effort just to say I’m so glad NBS finally restocked on fixative spray today. If I’ve been counting correctly, they do so every six months.
Now to try saving the pastel and charcoal drawings I’ve done over my entire stay here.
I feel like a winner today. Finished the last of my antibiotics (which is a relief because I eat like a redneck whenever I’m on those), got off work early to meet friends and got to talk about the cosmos over fastfood, plus this.
Thank you, Monday!
Forgot to put on here that I finally managed to buy myself a good desktop easel for watercolor painting and a little male mannequin which I am yet to baptize. I haven’t actually tried them out for size because I’ve been pretty preoccupied as of late but so far they’re still quite proving to be happy purchases - like all my other art accessories just sitting around.
Having lots of tools I almost never use just fill me with unexplainable joy.
Think I’ll call the little guy Buster. He does look quite a bit like that crash test dummy from Mythbusters from certain angles, I don’t know, whaddayathink?.
Snowpiercer (2013) | Joon-ho Bong
Another illustration based on a movie. Our EIC told me to illustrate any character from the movie so I chose Tilda Swinton because I love her.
The illustration’s styled to look like something from a french comic book, because the movie’s actually based on one - Le Transperceneige. I read the comic books too - or pretended. They were in french, obviously. Well,one can only try haha.